Monday, May 24, 2010♥7:19 PM
well, today was pretty much a normal day. same as every other day, wake up, go school, attend lectures, tutorials, labs, whatever and then go out eat and then go home. except, i wasnt feeling well today. idk why. last friday idk what happened to my knee. i was just leaning against the seat at the bus stop n then who knows the seat wasnt stable and moved. i nearly lost my balance and suddenly my knee was super painful. dont know what i did. yeaps. luckily after awhile, it wasnt so painful anymore. but when i reached home, and i accidentally stretched my leg, that stupid knee hurts like well, idk what, but ya. thank goodness i was able to sleep after awhile. so for the whole sat, i didnt move around much. end up, my leg got numb easily whenever i sit for too long. hmm.. so sunday was better and i walked quite alot. stupid of me. my leg got numb again at night when i was talking to dear. it hurt also. couldnt take it. felt like crying. hahas. was okay today. just that my leg was abit weak. but still, can walk. though i wasnt able to walk quite properly.
its been 16 days since we got tgt. i still dont know if this risk is worth taking or not. im really worried it'd end badly. okay, why am i repeating the same thing? idk. i really dont. i'd seriously appreciate it if someone can tell me the future. worrying is a sin, i know. but how can i not be worried? yes, he says that he's serious. but still, i cant put 100% trust in him. there's always that little 5% that i keep holding back. what can i do? should i just risked it all and put myself at stake again? i used to do that. but now, that gamble seems too big a risk for me to take. i love him. i do. i really do. i know i cant really tell by now, but still, i am very sure that i really love him. should i take the risk once more? but this time, it'll be either win, or lose everything. if things turns out well, then good. if not, i'll never be able to trust another guy again. still, i hope for the best.
thank you dear. for everything (:
&I'll smile for you(:
